Put this in your pipe and smoke it...

These two items (above the penny) are the remnants of old clay smoking pipes of the kind used during colonial times. The bowls are small by today's standards, because tobacco was more expensive back then. Even earlier pipes had yet smaller bowls. These probably date to the mid to late 1700's, and were allegedly dug from a dirt-floored cellar in a house near Leipsic, Delaware. Just what any decent pirate would have smoked with!